5 Things Parents do Which Promote Bad Behavior in Kids
Parents should understand children today have to be compatible with new generation thinking. Our forefathers had to change with these changing trends as well. Children have the ability to adapt, fit and go with the social changes of today’s society. Parents have to learn how to set the examples that will help their children behave and fit into the norms of society. There are many ways parents encourage bad behavior in their children, whether it be conscious or unconscious, which turns the child into a spoiled one.
Here are some ways that parents encourage bad behavior in their children.
You yell and scream across the room at your child. The walls aren’t exactly soundproof and the neighbors hear everything. Of course, you fail to reach your child and it goes in one year and out the other. You aren’t teaching your child anything positive. What you are doing is teaching your child that it’s fine to be aggressive. You show how easy it is to lose your cool, and that you know longer can control your own situations. This shows your child that in some situations it’s okay not to be respectful. Be careful and stay in control.
In the society parents are raising their children in now, know that research has shown that beating kids can lead to bad outcomes. Some of these outcomes should not be exposed to anyone because there is bruising. Defiance is the outcome parents get with hitting and beating. This behavior can cause the child to do things that will hurt them and you at the same time. Studies have shown that physical punishment such as beating, can be related to antisocial behavior, a decrease in sympathy, empathy, and remorse. This type of behavior also can lead to increased aggression.
After the parent has threatened the child in the worst way imaginable, the child thinks something bad is coming for them. In some child’s minds, they are thinking this is not going to happen. All this, tells your child that you also are lying to them. Every time you lie to your child, they start believing you less and one day this can lead to you not having the authority anymore.
Giving in to the whims and weeps of your child
You are always nervous about taking your child to the store. You know they will always throw a temper tantrum sooner or later and start with their requests. Your children know your weaknesses by now and they prey on those weaknesses. They know how to push your buttons and get what they want.
It’s time you as a parent put an end to this behavior. They know throwing tantrums will get them what they want. You will regain more of your peace when you put a stop to the tantrums, and your child will grow up learning they can’t have all they want in the world. When your children start throwing tantrums or begging you constantly, it’s time to turn around and go back into the car and regroup. You might hear a lot of name-calling, however; kindly keep your cool and drop them off at home with a sitter or your spouse. Tell them next time if they behave you will take them along to the store. Go back to the store and continue shopping without them.
Setting the wrong examples
Remember never to set the wrong examples in front of your children. You are not helping them in any way. An example of this is let’s say you decide to go on a family outing to the beach. It’s a hot day out and you decide to bring your dog. As you enter the gate you begin to read the rules or you might decide to disregard the rules. Whatever you choose to do, one of the rules states “NO DOGS” on the beach. You decide to tie your dog to the fence. A lifeguard notices the dog and informs you about the rules on the gate. You or your spouse automatically start an argument with the lifeguard in front of your children. The lifeguard tries to diffuse the argument, however; you feel you are right and don’t have to follow that rule. You start calling the lifeguard names and next thing you see is the police pulling up. Is that the example you want to set in front of your children? Now you get a ticket for disrespecting a public official. Your children grow up thinking it’s ok to argue with authority figures or parents, teachers, etc. You now wonder where you went wrong.
Research has shown parents that society has changed drastically in the last 75 years in regards to child rearing. 50 years ago, your children were told to be seen and not heard at family gatherings. Social media was a future blip and people knew their place in regards to having the proper manners. There were still several different socio-economic levels of society throughout the history of America. Children were still taught the same level of manners and discipline. The years have brought more mental disorders in each generation causing parents and teachers to start using a different approach with children. There is more divorce, more different relationships between parents and children sometimes find themselves having 4 or 5 step-siblings, along with some new half sisters and half brothers. Blending families can be very stressful for children. There are different cultures and ways of discipline that are also being blended into these nontraditional families.
Parents should want to break any bad and negative habits that they learned growing up. You want to make each generation better than the last. If you grew up with constant yelling and hitting, it doesn’t mean you have to raise your children the same way. Bad behaviors create aggressive children. In addition, some children are shy and become withdrawn from this kind of negative environment. All you can do is your best and if you find you are having a problem, seek help immediately and find some support groups. There are many good professionals that have parenting classes in your area.