Single Fathers: Tips on How to Raise your Daughter
Parenting can be one of the hardest jobs out there, sometimes even for the simple fact that you are responsible 24 out of 7 for a little person who cannot take care of themselves properly, and who seems like they are constantly trying to hurt themselves through their active exploration of the world they have ahead of themselves.
It’s hard enough to manage a child between two parents, or even when you have the support of your family as an added bonus on top of that as well, and yet, there are few who find themselves in a position of having to raise a child all alone.
Because of such lack of additional support when going through the journey of raising a child, single parents often tend to underestimate themselves and it’s easy to forget just how much they accomplish even on their own when the feedback is limited. However, despite the fact that the efforts and stress are multiplied, there are no secret bonus things a single parent needs to know or do in order to care for their child accordingly. Figuring out how to approach different situations might be a slower process though, but we’re here to help, especially when it comes to raising strong and confident daughters, with head-ups for single fathers!
A common misconception when it comes to single fathers raising little girls is that they won’t be able to form as strong of a bond as she might do with a female figure in her life, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. If anything, fathers always tend to get along better with their daughters, as it is a psychological thing. Still, that ancient misconception can dim a single father’s confidence in his own powers to raise a daughter, so here are some tips on how to regain that self-confidence and place more trust in yourself!
Be communicative
The most important thing in any sort of relationship, be that a friendship or a parent-child bond, is to be approachable and communicative, so you two can understand each other properly and avoid any misunderstandings or conflicts that could have otherwise been easily solved or not experienced altogether through the simple act of conversing about whatever issues there might be in the first place.
Other times, external factors, such as trouble at the workplace or in school, tend to cause unnecessary stress and once they’re brought home, they create tension and irritability between family members. Talking about things that bother each of you is a good idea in order to vent all those frustrations out and improve your mood, as well as have a little bonding time. The better you two understand each other, what upsets you and how you can improve each other’s mood, the better you will get along.
Support her and her interests
Although games, tv shows or artists might not personally interest everyone, every child loves to talk about the things they like most, be those the new console game or that singer they wish they could see live. This doesn’t mean you have to suddenly adopt their interests, hobbies, likes and dislikes and remodel yourself after their own personal preferences and personality, but as a parent, being involved in your child’s life and interests is a major key in getting to know them properly and building a better parent-child bond.
If your daughter shows an interest in a hobby, support her love for it and encourage her to further pursue her hobby or talent. Maybe it’s a fleeting interest, maybe it’s something that will define her whole life later on, but either way, she will remember if you were next to her to support her or if she was met with indifference or rejection from you. A child’s main source of validation is their parent, and it impacts them the most to acquire it from them. Encouraging her to pursue her interests also helps to consolidate her self-esteem and an overall desire to further gain those interests and be open to discovering more hobbies and passions, which is a very beneficial thing for a developing child of any age.
Don’t hover
It is a child’s nature to want to walk on their own, to discover all the world has prepared to them through exciting adventures and sometimes making mistakes is the only way to learn new things and better comprehend the meaning of them. In order to offer them that freedom of exploring and learning, and improving their skills and self-confidence on their own too, a parent shouldn’t constantly hover over their child’s shoulder, especially as they grow older.
Respect your child’s privacy at all times and strive to build strong mutual trust instead of worrying about having to check up on the child’s whereabouts, company or activities at all times in fear that something might happen, or that someone else might be trouble for them. Parenting doesn’t have to be even more stressful than it already is, so it’s a great idea to make it easier on both yourself and your child if you can. The less you two stress each other, the better you will get along.
This, however, doesn’t mean to let the child roam free at all of the day’s hours and in whatever company they wish to go but to be understanding and reasonable when it comes to hangouts, dates or even just school in general. If you think that someone or something might not be so beneficial for your child, try approaching them about it before jumping to conclusions or taking other measures of dealing with what might or might not prove to be an issue in the first place.
Teach problem-solving, don’t coddle
With a soft spot for their little girls, it’s sometimes difficult for fathers to avoid trying to fix their child’s problems for her, to show their love and support. However, every child needs to be able to solve things on their own, or at least come up with solutions that could get them towards a fix. As such, teaching problem-solving is much better in the long run than surrounding them with bubble wrap and a “tell them they will face me” kind of attitude. Once the child develops their own sense of independence and life carries them out of the family nest, they won’t be able to rely on the support of a parent as much as they might have been able to during their childhood or teenagehood.
So instead, prepare her for life, step by step, and watch her grow into an intelligent and capable young woman who you can be proud of at all times.